Tuesday, February 1, 2011
And so it begins....tomorrow (February 1st, 2011)
Is there really a world out there that still goes back to our evolutionary roots? Is there really a world out there where people live off the fat of the land?
There has to be.
Tomorrow, I start my quest to find such a place. Tomorrow, I go to Africa. This morning I woke up and went right back to the comforts of my bed. The blinds kept my small room darkened until I saw it fit to make it light. Pressing the snooze button to my alarm and trying to decipher what was lucid dreaming and what was actual dreaming crowd my mind. It is my last day in the states. I should be up trying to gobble down the greasiest foods I can find and embrace all that America has to offer me. Instead, I doze back into and let my mind run wild.
The alarm sounds. It is 12:30 p.m.
I stumble out of bed, shower and get ready for my final day. Not much is actually happening the day before, but to my mind, there is more happening than in years passing.
My thoughts vary from moments of ecstasy to depression and everything in between. Africa, the place with so much political unrest and corruption, surely something will go wrong. The thought of being robbed at the airport and being sent to a Tanzanian prison for being an American have crossed my mind. These thoughts are quickly balanced with the thought of what I will see. The sights that I will see when I am there will be in my mind's eye for the rest of my days here on earth. A new chapter in my life is about to begin. I am about to embark on something that most college students will never experience. I am blessed. What if I get eaten by a lion. That would be a hell of way to die. Would people remember me, what would my funeral be like. I bet it would be big. I'm going to own the jungle, I'll probably walk out of that place with a lion's hide on my back and a necklace full of exotic teeth.What if no one cares that I'm gone. Will I be missed? Will there really be people that are interested in what I'm doing? Is this good for what I want to do in the longrun? What if something happens when I'm abroad that will change my life forever? Am I ready for that change? Will the return be as miserable as my return from Israel? Am I qualified enough? Am I ready? Have I learned everything I deem necessary to learn before I leave? I bet the people on the trip are going to be really down to earth. I hope they have a lot I can learn from them.
In sum, what I really want to accomplish from this trip are a few things. I want to live nature. That is, I want to be at one with the earth. I want to understand more about myself. I want to learn about other people, ecosystems and Africa. I want to learn other ways of living this crazy thing that we call life. I want to add a new lens to my mind's eye. I want to experience something so drastically different that my life will never be the same. I want to be reborn. And so it begins.....tomorrow.
There has to be.
Tomorrow, I start my quest to find such a place. Tomorrow, I go to Africa. This morning I woke up and went right back to the comforts of my bed. The blinds kept my small room darkened until I saw it fit to make it light. Pressing the snooze button to my alarm and trying to decipher what was lucid dreaming and what was actual dreaming crowd my mind. It is my last day in the states. I should be up trying to gobble down the greasiest foods I can find and embrace all that America has to offer me. Instead, I doze back into and let my mind run wild.
The alarm sounds. It is 12:30 p.m.
I stumble out of bed, shower and get ready for my final day. Not much is actually happening the day before, but to my mind, there is more happening than in years passing.
My thoughts vary from moments of ecstasy to depression and everything in between. Africa, the place with so much political unrest and corruption, surely something will go wrong. The thought of being robbed at the airport and being sent to a Tanzanian prison for being an American have crossed my mind. These thoughts are quickly balanced with the thought of what I will see. The sights that I will see when I am there will be in my mind's eye for the rest of my days here on earth. A new chapter in my life is about to begin. I am about to embark on something that most college students will never experience. I am blessed. What if I get eaten by a lion. That would be a hell of way to die. Would people remember me, what would my funeral be like. I bet it would be big. I'm going to own the jungle, I'll probably walk out of that place with a lion's hide on my back and a necklace full of exotic teeth.What if no one cares that I'm gone. Will I be missed? Will there really be people that are interested in what I'm doing? Is this good for what I want to do in the longrun? What if something happens when I'm abroad that will change my life forever? Am I ready for that change? Will the return be as miserable as my return from Israel? Am I qualified enough? Am I ready? Have I learned everything I deem necessary to learn before I leave? I bet the people on the trip are going to be really down to earth. I hope they have a lot I can learn from them.
In sum, what I really want to accomplish from this trip are a few things. I want to live nature. That is, I want to be at one with the earth. I want to understand more about myself. I want to learn about other people, ecosystems and Africa. I want to learn other ways of living this crazy thing that we call life. I want to add a new lens to my mind's eye. I want to experience something so drastically different that my life will never be the same. I want to be reborn. And so it begins.....tomorrow.
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